I think back often about childhood, my wild & wayward teenage years, and my very young married adult life and I am filled with gratitude. Do you ever look at your life and think WHY DOES ANYONE TRUST ME WITH ALL THIS??!!?? I do. All.The.Time.
My childhood was good. 2 loving parents. 2 sisters. A dog or two. Two story ranch home and a family dinner most nights.
Teenage years were rebellious. Wild, free and wayward. Volleyball and my Youth Group were my sanity. I'm not sure how I made either of them a priority between the parties, but I did. They both had such a massive impact on my life.
At 21 Jason and I got married.
Also, I am stubborn and I didn't come from a home where we talked that much so communication hasn't always come easy and communication about conflict...well, I run.
Last month, we celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary in Maui, doing what we love- vacationing and attending a conference! This one was a marriage conference. Check out https://www.lovesonggetaway.com if you are interested in a marriage retreat in a tropical destination. We were highly impressed with this event and the line up!
Dr. Gary Chapman was one of the speakers! The older I get, the more I am in tune with others personality traits, so the love languages are right up my alley! Dr. Gary Chapman shared a short list on overcoming barriers in communication and I love each and every one of these, so I am sharing them with you too! I pray that if you are hitting road blocks in any relationship, especially marriage, that you will read these!
1. Learn your partners interest's.
2. Ask their advice. Ask specific questions.
3. Check your own output. Your spouse will never talk more, if you talk more.
4. Share a book. Read a chapter and share 1 thing. Take it week by week.
6. Meet each others sexual needs.
7. Pray together. Silent prayer. (hold hands. close your eyes. pray silently. say amen)
People in my tribe say regularly that they love the love that Jason and I share. I do too, but it hasn't always been easy. It's always always always been worth it.
Learning him, what makes him tick, his love language and his apology language has been so fulfilling to get to understand.
One of my favorite pieces of marriage advice that changed our trajectory was several years ago at church the pastor said to think of your husband like a cork in a bucket. It's my role everyday to make him float. Add water, love, respect, and a good meal and watch what happens to that cork. And your marriage.